


Dora the drugdealer

by Baka_nekonya



Category: Dora the Explorer (Cartoon)
Genre: Made at 3 am for no particular reason im sorry for creating this in the first place, i have no idea if this was done before but this is my take on it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:13:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26340202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baka_nekonya/pseuds/Baka_nekonya
Summary: Dora goes on a journey with her comic relief companion Boots to save her free cupcake membership regristration from the boss of the Yamooza, Benny the bull.Also, learn how to count and say random things in spanish through Dora which was badly google translated.Also, also, i couldnt be bothered to proof read or edit this so feel free to do it yourself or just get eye cancer through horrendus spelling mistakes and horrifing grammar.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	Dora the drugdealer

Dora was a drugdealer since she was a small kid.Her mami and papi taught her about the buisness before being arrested and excecuted.So to avenge their efforts and earn some cash for herself,she shipped all sorts of drugs to anyone and everyone.she found a small monkey by the name of Boots and took him in,teaching him about the ways of a drugdealer.They have been the main operators of Marquez's 'pharmacy' ever since.

They had to run away from the cops many many times,which mainly consisted of Swiper the fox, a promising character that might just ruin Dora drugdealing career.But they soon found a weakness in him,words.

Dora had said pretty mean things about his broken family and adopted self,breaking his heart and chasing him away for a while.However,Swiper had a really short term memory,as he came back the very next day to arrest Dora and Boots for selling some Ice to Elsa illgally.

But thats besides the point.

Dora had now found a foolproof plan to stop Swiper from bringing her back to the police station.(And have fun tramutising him about his poor childhood at the same time)

And now its time for the theme song,where Dora earrapes the crowd.

Dododododo-Dora!  
Dododododo-Dora!  
Dora Dora Dora the drugdealer!  
Dora!!  
Boots is super high like Dora,Dora!  
Sniffing crack!  
Hide the drugs,lets go!  
Jump in,vamanos!  
We do drugs all day!  
Hey!Hey!  
Dodo-Dora  
Dodo-Dora  
Dodo-Dora  
Dodo-Dora  
Swiper is adopted!  
Swiper is adpoted!  
Oh man!(crying fox noises)  
Dora the Drugdealer!

Today Dora had an order from Benny the cow.Benny was the current head of the yamooza and a huge sissy.Benny actually collected all the barbie dolls out there and plays with them regularly.He had ordered a huge amount of heroin, and wanted it shipped to his secret base in Uganda.

"Hola! Soy,Dora!....Uganda?!?You must be mad! Thats too far away from Latino and i dont even have money to buy a cardboard box!"Dora exclaimed,aghast at the location.

"You know you don't need to say that everytime you make a phone call,right? And did'nt you make a lot of money just from yesterdays transaction?"Benny asked.

"Well Boots spent all the money on a inflatable bouncy castle and pumped it up with the heroin we were suppoused to send to you today and burst the thing, sending it flying everywhere and we got high and-

"You did what with my heroin?!"Benny shouted with audible rage.

Dora tried to explain her position(emphasis on tried)"Espera!(wait)Look I know it was a bad desicion and we also fed it to the ducks in the public park pond-

"Dont forget the time we sprinkled the excess heroin over the crowd at a new year party!"Boots chimed in.

"Yeah that was fun. Good times.And then-

"I don't want to hear about the dumb things you did,Dora!*sigh* I"ve been too leineint on you, and i had enough trying to cover up your mistakes.If you dont deliver by tonight,you can forget about keeping your Free Cupcake membership card!!!"Benny roared before cutting the call.

"Nooo!The cupcakes are my only comfort in life!Except the drugs but nooOoOOoOOOOOoOOOooOOOooOoOOOOOoOOOOoo!!!!!!"Dora wailed to no one in particular.

"Thats the reason why you have liver failure right,right?"Boots happily cheered.

"Shut up,Boots!You're only here for comic relief!"Dora shouted admist tears.

"I chimpan-see,Dora! We ape to get back to the program though!"Boots chortled after a rim shot was heard.

"..."

Minutes later,Dora walked out of the kitchen with a bowl of soup and some fur.

"Boots was right.We should get back to the program.

"...What about the blood on my shirt?Oh i just cooked monkey soup and i would like to share it with Boots!

"Oh wait,where is Boots?Can you see Boots?

"...Where?

"...I dont see him.

"...In the bowl im holding? Wow, you're correct! I actually cooked monkey soup with him because he was making horrible puns!"Dora smiled as a warning to those who actually laughed at Boots attempted humor.

"Anyways, we made Benny really,really,really angry that he even treathened to revoke my cupcake membership rights! What should we do now?

"...Beg for forgiveness?Psshhh!No way! I was thinking we went to Bennys house and kill him! Then I could have all the cupcakes i want and loads of money!

"....How am i going to travel to Uganda?I did say is didn't have enough money to buy a cardboard box.Well we could ask Tico the squirrel to send us there!"Dora proposed to no one and headed out to find Tico.

...

"Almost forgot! My trusty AK-47!Never leave home with those and 4 hand graneades!"

Dora quickly got lost as she was a dimwit and a moron with no sense of direction.

"Oh No! Im lost!How am I going to go to Tico's house how?"Dora exclaimed really loudly,earning quite a few stares from everyone present.

"Thats right!The Map!But the son of a b*tch is sleeping as of the moment so I need your help to wake him up!

"Say it with me! WaAke Me uP wAKe Me up InsIDe!CaN'T gET UP!wAkE me Uup iNSiDe!peastereggkdjvjridigkgfkfkhdjjfg djcjfjggj weswmaltryovksvkmfvnegffhgppsmwck!!!"

"Okay,sheesh Dora! How do you even do that with your mouth?" A grumpy voice sighed. "So what did you do this time? Which remote country do we have to migrate to again?"

"Amigo,i appreciate that you do not tell our audience about the time where we went and conned many people of their Roblox accounts and got reported so badly that we had to migrate to another country and here we are!"Dora accidentally said what she wasn't suppoused to.

"Hold up. What audience? Are you high again?" The Map asked,slightly worried about Dora's mental health.

"No.But to tell the truth i do miss my daily shots of cocaine.Don't you see them?The ones staring at us!"Dora said,breaking the forth wall.

"Oh.That."The Map was still not convinced.

"Furthermore,don't you have something to do?"Dora gave another of those innocently demonic smiles.

"Dora,this is the sixty-ninth time you made me sing that stupid song and were not doing that again-

"Do it."Dora pointed the AK-47 at the Map.

"Alright,alright!Jeez!Ill do it!"The map grumbled and hopped off her bag to start the song.

"If there's a place you need to go  
Im the one you need to know  
Im the map...  
Im the map.......  
Don't wanna do this anymore  
These lyrics are such a sore...  
Im the map..........."The Map sung rather reluctantly and mornfully.

"Sing it more joyfully!!!"She cupped her mouth and shouted.

"If theres a place you've gotta get  
I can get you there i bet  
Im the map  
Im the map  
Im the map  
Im the map  
Im the map  
Im the map  
Im the map  
Im the map..  
I lost count, Dora.  
Can i stop now?  
Im the map  
Im the map."The Map waited for Dora's approval.

She shook her large head and told the map to start over.

And then the Map let out a scream,filled with all his anguish,sorrow,and hate.But he did it anyways as Dora had the gun out.

Dora was pleased with the song after five redos and they moved on to the other part.

"As i was saying,where do we need to go this time? The far lands?Well news flash,it dosen't exist!"The Map said sacastically.

"I just need to get to Tico's house so that i can fly to Uganda."Dora explained.

"...are you kidding me?!!!? The fat lump of fur's house is just infront of you and you didn't even notice!?? Where are your brains Dora?"The Map exclaimed exasperatedly.

"Well my mami and papi thought my big head would be a perfect place to fit drugs in so they got a brain transplant with a talking squirrel to make space for drugs and thats how i always am so dumb and have a spare stash of cocaine on me at all times.But gracia,Map!"Dora screeched,walking to the small cottage just five metres away.

"We should sing a song!"

"Come on,vámanos!  
Everyone lets go!  
Come on let's get to it,i know we can do it!  
Where are we going?  
*Clap,clap,clap*  
To Tico's house!  
Where are we going?  
*Clap,clap,clap*  
To Tico's-

The Map intertupted Dora angrily,"You are literally five metres away from his house!Stop dilly dallying and get to it alreadly!"

"Sheesh,you're such a killjoy." Dora grumbled and stopped infront of Tico's house.

Dora ringed the door bell once.And again.And again.And again.Tico still did not answer or opended the door so she decided to bash it open with her big head.

The door was busted open and Dora stumbled in,shocked to find Tico snuggling aganst a Hatsune Miku body pillow.He woke up immeadiately,shocked.

"Wa-wait i can explain!"He squeaked,tossing the pillow aside.

"Don't.I respect your descision,Tico."Dora solemly said.She then proceeded to sitdown on the tiny chairs that was meant for squirrels,not humans.But she sat down as there was only that to sit on.

"Ahem.So,uh...what brings you here,Dora?"Tico asked,sitting down as well.He brought some water over and poured a glass for Dora.

"I need a favour."

"Is it another trip to the North Pole? We almost didn't make it back that time...."Tico nervously muttered.

"Dude,you're the one who wanted to search for Santa Claus and almost died of hyperthermia!"Dora retorted.

"Did i just hear a four siballed word come out of your mouth? Wow dude...But... anyways i had to prove he was real!"Tico's eyes were brimming with tears as he said that.

"Santa isn't real."She simply said,and it was enough to bring Tico to tears.

"Wahhhhhhhhhhh!Of all the people who could have told me!!!!Doraaaaaaa!!!!"Tico wailed.

"Tico! Shut up! The cops will hear us!" Dora waened.But Tico continued to cry,such that his tears formed a large puddle on the ground.

Dispite Dora's attempts to keep the squirrel quiet, he was too much of a crybaby to stop. So Dora got angry.

"Tico!" Dora took out her hand graneade.

"Shut." She pulled out the pin.

"The f*ck." She aimed it.

"UP!!!" Dora threw the graneade,causing a huge explosion and Tico's body to split as he screamed his regret for not hugging his body pillow one last time.The explosion rocked the foundations of Dora's world, and she wore sunglasses (even though it was night time ) and casually stepped out of Tico's house.

Cannabis started to rain down from the sky and Dora realised that that was the reason why Tico smelt funny all the time. She rejoyced and sucked in wealthy amounts of the sweet, pure, bliss.

She suddenly felt like she could do anything.From swimming on land to eating Tico's remains.

But something inturrupted her moment.Dora was hunched over some red goey pieces of flesh when she heard a loud siren sound.She dismissed it as the side effects of the drugs and continued.She kept hearing the sound though,and thought it strange when her red shot eyes caught bright flashes of red and blue.

Huh. I could have sworn it was the fuzz.Dora thought as she did somersaults everywhere.

It was.

Too late, a bunch of police cars showed up and surrounded Dora. She hissed and stood up,glaring at the cars.

One door opened,and a fox came out of it.

Aww crap! I'm so screwed! Dora thought,as she sprinted for the nearest tree to hide. Her brain actually thought up of a smart idea,which namely was: if I can't see Swiper, he can't see me!

So she hid. But unfortunately for her, her large ass head peeked out of the tree.

" I can literally see you right there,Dora. There's no need to hide, because today is the day I bring you to justice! After all these years....." The fox continued to monolouge,which made Dora really bored as she sniffed more of the drugs on the floor.

"Are you even listening?! I'm going to arrest you and your- ugh! Hands above your head,Dora you're under arrest! " Swiper shouted as he approached Dora with a pair of hand cuffs.

"Oh no! I'm going to get caught if I don't do something! I need to find somewhere else to hide!" She screamed.

Dora used her fat ass head to dig three blocks down(somehow). Then she covered herself in. As Dora sniffed even more cannabis in the ground she spotted Swiper followimf her. That made Dora panic and dig down even faster.

But all things have to come up, and she did. She popped her head up and popped her entire body up. However, she miraculously came up the same hole she went in from. Swiper quickly followed and resurfaced as well.

" Resistance is fultile,Dora. Your drug dealing days are offically over!" Swiper shouted,as he conered her inbetween the police cars.

The drugs have lost their effect,and Dora finally remembered the one way to chase Swiper away.(it rhymes)

"Cuidado!(look out) Swiper is trying to arrest me and i can't allow that cause i need to claim back my free cupcake membership card. Swiper is really insecure about his past so if we remind him that he is adopted, he'll go away!

"So say it with me!  
Swiper you're adopted!  
Swiper you're adopted!  
Swiper you're adopted!" Dora shrieked,and the fox's eyes started to water.

"You-you're so meaannnnnnnnn!!! Waaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!" Swiper cried, and got into a police car, speeding away.

" Great job! Lo hicimos!(we did it)" Dora pumped her fist into the air and jumped.

"Now, lets get Tico and go to Uganda!" Dora said to on one and headed towards the ruined house.

"Tico?....Where are you? And why is there so much blood on the ground?" Dora whispered. She thought her voice was too loud in the deafining silence and shrugged it off as a side effect of the drugs.

"Looks like Tico is missing! Can you help me find him?"

"..."

" Great! So where is he?"

"Over there? I don't see him!"

"All the blood and chunks of meat scattered across the ground his his?! Looks like you're right! Tico was dumb and didn't shut up so i killed him too! Great job!"

Dora wiped her brow." Phew! All this work is really getting me to be very exhausted! Should we take a break?"

Yes. No.

She looked at the two options.

"Nah who needs choices? Your opinion does'nt matter!"

*Cue montage of Dora on the floor for 10 hours*

Suddenly,while she was resting, her phone started ringing. Despite her fury at someone even daring to interrupt her moments of peace and quiet( it was just her screaming and shrieking), she thought it was a good idea to try out some cursed phone call lines

"Good morning! This is Pete's pizzeria and abortion clinic! Where yesterday's loss is today's sauce! We have an offer of one abortion for one free pizza! How can i help you?" Dora tried her best not to giggle.

" Yes i would like to indulge in your special offer- wait that's not what i was calling for. Doraaaaaaaaa!!!" The screaming voice on the other line was apparently Benny the cow, and he was livid!

"Where. Are. My. Druuuugs!!!" He hollered,making Dora's ear bleed. Dora instantly regretted her desicion and replied that she was on her way before cutting the call.

"Oh no! Benny is getting really impatient on top of getting mad! We have to hurry!" Dora ran to the back of the once proud house and realised that the plane had been demolished when she threw the graneade.

" Double oh no! I accidentally blew up the plane that we were suppoused to go in! Now what?"

Dora suddenly had a flash of inspiration. Her trusty backpack, who had dutifully carried out its duty of carring her items around everywhere. Maybe it was time to use it.

"We need to wake up the Backpack so that we can get to Uganda! So everyone say it with me-

"No! Please not an earrape of despacito! Not agaiiiann!" A voice pleaded. It belonged to the backpack,who wiggled free of Dora and landed on the floor.

"Yes the song the song i need to do the song…" it nevoursly muttered.

"Backpack!  
Backpack!  
Backpack!  
Backpack!  
On the backpack loaded with drugs  
And some peepee poopoo  
Any drug you might need i think i got inside for you!  
Backpack!  
Backpack  
Backpack  
Backpack  
Backpack..  
….

The purple backpack carried on,lowering its voice to a whisper. "Ahem. I think that's too many backpacks." Dora kindly ordered. (A lot kinder than other instances)

"Oh yeah. I'm sorry. Now, what do you need from me? Heroin? Ice? Cannabis? Cocaine? I've got all those!" The Backpack grinned nervously.

"Yeah I need a plane. Thanks." Dora requested.

"A-a what? " It asked, trembling.

"A plane. P-L-A-N-E." Dora said slowly, in case the Backpack didn't hear properly the first time.

The only problem was, it didn't have a plane. But it was too scared to tell that to Dora. The Backpack knew how much of a short fuse she had and was not willing to be Dora's next meal. 

"Yeah! S-sure! So just close your eyes and-" the Backpack frantically took out all its glue and Estacy as it had a brainwave.(do backpacks even have brains? Well they do have a face and a mouth so i guess.)

It also sniffed some glue and snorted a lot of Estacy, getting its motivation. Backpack started to piece together some of the powder and glued them together. While Dora was sucking Tico's eyeball like a gobstopper, the Backpack moved at a surprising speed,(considering it didn't have arms). It stuck more Estacy upon layers of Estacy, untill it formed a vague shape of a sausage with wings. 

Dora moved on to the second eyeball, while the Backpack continued to pile on more Estacy, forming all the details and final shapes. It made the pessanger seats and the pilot's cockpit, with the engine sector consisting of a large hamster wheel.

Dora got impatient waiting, even though only ten minutes had passed, and went up to the Backpack." So are you done?" The Backpack snapped out of its high and stuttered a nervous 'yes'.

Dora sniffed the thing, and instantly got high. "Wowza! This chicken is huge! Let's go fly a plane!"

The Backpack was unsure if the thing would work, afterall, it was made with some highly unstable substances. 

"But we need someone to run on the hamster wheel, don't we?" Dora slurred.

The Backpack had also just made the connection as they stepped into the plane (of sorts). So it had another idea, under the spell of the drugs.

"What if… we revived Boots? Tico is too fat and Boots is willing to do anything for you." The Backpack mused.

"Meh." She shrugged, having absoultely zero idea on what the Backpack was saying. 

So the Backpack took that as a sign of approval and spat out Boots along with a vat of paint thinner. It then took the very confused monkey (again, with no hands) and dumped him into the paint thinner. The vat went silent before bubbling and shaking violently. The Backpack and Dora stood back, and watched fearfully and curiously.

It continued to wobble and wiggle,leaning from this side to the other. Then, it finally went still once more.

Suddenly, a shapeless blob jumped out from the inside of the vat, running and tumbling around like a feral cat. The gunk soon fell out and revealed it to be Boots the monkey! However he was high as shit and started to run around like a mad monkey. The Backpack tried to pull Boots into the plane but to no avail as it had no hands. 

At this rate, Dora's cupcake membership card would be taken away! As soon as she heard that, her eyes widened and she used physic powers to lift everyone and dumped them into the plane. 

She hopped into the plane and dragged Boots by the scruff of his neck, throwing him into the hamster wheel. A banana appeared infront of him and he lunged it it, in high hopes to revtrieve the tasty treat. 

Obviously he wouldn't get it but the dumb monkeyfriker kept leaping and jumping at it, providing the plane with the energy it needed. 

"Woah! Dora, since when did you have physic powers!?" The Backpack asked in awe. The big headed girl shrugged, and she then slung the Backpack over her back before making her at towards the pilot cockpit.

"Hmmm….let's fly a plane." Dora cracked her knuckles, and pressed a button. It started blasting 'Bitch lagsania'. She liked the music and didn't turn it off. She accidently knocked her head on another button, turning on the jet engines. Dora gripped onto the stirring wheel handle, and jerked it up.

Surprisingly, the plane took off.

And more surprisingly, it landed without any problems. Dora went to the back to check up on her monkey-like comic relieve. He was panting and sweating like a dog ( even though he was a monkey), but felt happy to be alive. 

"Thank you, Dora! That was the mon-key to unlocking my life! Hee-hrheheheheh!" The small monkey had the incentive to make jokes, when he just got back alive.

"..."

BANG!

That was the sound of Dora blasting a huge hole in the unfortunate monkey's head. He slumped to the ground, dead. 

" Seesh you suck Boots. Alright! Now lets go get Benny!!!" She shouted, walking off in the wrong direction. She realised it a lot later when she found herself in some kind of snowy landscape.

"Uh oh! I need to turn back! Benny is already angry!" She did exactly that, and sometime later, she managed to find herself at the gates of Benny's house. It was a mansion and it was surrounded with tall, metal fences and weirdly looked like a barn. 

Dora wanted to storm the front gates, but she noticed a lot of guards around it. Drat! She thought, creeping around a cluster of bushes. I need to get in! But how…..hummmmmmm

She then saw a section where there was no fencing and crept towards it. Dora noticed that there was a guard standing outside the mansion though. She just needed to drug him in order to get in. And drugs are her area of expertise. 

Dora fished out a glass bottle of chloroform, and a cloth. She was prepared for it. So she stuck out a leg, and tripped, accidentally hurtling the bottle towards the guards head. 

The bottle struck him on the head, and he fell to the ground with a thud. Dora stood up, and thought, wow. Today's a lucky day.

She jinxed herself.

Apparrntly the guards heard the sound of glass shattering and started to rush to the scene. Dora realised that and panicked. She needed to get into the house undetected or else she was doomed!

At that moment, she spotted a open window not very high up from her spot. She thought, maybe I can get in from there. After all,there is a ledge I can get up on to access the window!

So, she attempted the stunt that would decide her fate. Putting one leg onto the ledge, she pushed and gripped the window ledge. Then, Dora stuck her head through, realising that it was too big to go into the window! She tried to back away, but her unfortunate head was just too big to get unstuck!

Fear of being found out rose in her stomach. She twisted and turned her head, but to no avail. She gave one last pull, grunted, and the window frame gave way.

Dora fell to the ground and took the window frame off her head, scampering in the opposite direction of where the guards came from. 

She ran towards the front door, which (luckily for her, didn't have any guards) had a keypad for a password. 

"Ah, dang! A number based password… What are some numbers that Benny would choose?" Dora wondered. This entire setup was based on memes and drugs so she guessed that she should go for the 'nice' numbers.

She keyed it in.

6...9… ...BZZT! Wrong security code! One last try before self destruct is activated. A female automated voice said.

Dora cursed and thought really hard on her final answer.

Then she tried once more.

4...2...0… ...BEEP! *Crab rave starts playing in the background* That is correct! You may now enter! 

Dora pumped the air, rushing into the barn/mansion.

However, she ran into one more obstacle. The front door was locked. The heavy double doors of red and white was locked, and there was a huge keyhole in the center.

Maybe… it was time to use those granades she saved up.

"Shhhh. Remember, we need to not arouse any attention from the guards. So we have to set it off quietly." Dora whispered loudly.

So she pulled the loud pin and threw the very loud graneade at the door before running back.

KABLAMBOIAHSIASJBJKSSKWJ!!!!

The ground vibrated and a great gust of wind threatened to blow Dora away. And when the dust finally cleared, she saw a huge hole instead of the doors.

Obviously the guards heard the super loud epxlosion, and ran towards the front. 

Shortly after, the guards managed to surround Dora. She yelped and ran into the house. The interior decor was really pretty, but she had other things to take care of. The guards ran in after her, staying a distance away just in case.

"Who are you?" One of them asked.

Dora tried (and failed to do a Batman impression) ," your worst nightmare."

"Okay first that Batman impression sucked. Second, get out of the house or we will open fire at you!" Another guard shouted. As if on cue, all the guards brought out their guns and cocked them.

Dora jumped.

"Wa-wait! Don't shoot! I have another graneade!" And to show emphasis, she took out her last graneade from her bag.

That caused the guards to veer back a little. She edged foreward, hoping to scare them. Placing her finger on the pin, she tried to scare them even further.

But she accidentally tripped and pulled it, also accidentally throwing it towards the guards. They all started screaming and scattering, and another explosion errupted.

The dust settled once more, and everything was cleared out. Seeing that there was no trace of the guards left and a huge pool of blood, she went upwards.

Whistling her theme song, she found Benny faster then she thought she would.

"Well, well,well. What do we have here." It was Benny, lounging on a chair in theiddle of the room. He had assistants fawning around him, and he was drinking milk from a goblet.

" It's Dora. And what's with that line? You sound like a lame villain with that milk. At least drink wine or something else more terryfing. Plus, is this room only for your excuse of a throne? It's a waste of space and seriously, the spangles on the chair makes the entire setup really gaudy. Even for you, Benny. Do you have like, no sense of fashion?" Dora trash talked him.

The cow looked really offended. "Okay first of all, this is for kids. We're all minors! Wine is illegal! And secondly, no, I also like to do my daily yoga exercise in this space! Thirdly, you can never have too many spangles! It makes things look more shiny and cool!" Benny retorted.

"Now, as you obviously know, the deadline for the drugs are way overdue. So, I'm going to cancel your membership right in front of you." Benny took a paper with Dora's name signed on it, and mercilessly ripped the poor paper into itty bitty pieces.

Dora wailed with anguish. The only thing that ever mattered to her, destroyed! Falling to her knees, she wept at the loss of her good friend. Her one comfort in the harsh cruelty of life.

As the pieces of dead wood fell to the ground, she hardened her resolve. She had a plan from the start, and now, she was going to use it.

Dora whipped out her Ak-47 and pointed it straight at Benny. 

"That's it. I have had it with you, Benny from the yamooza! It's time you stepped down, pemernantly! " Dora roared, charging towards the cow.

He was taken by surprise, and dropped his goblet. A smirk came across his face afterwards though.

"Oh, you're approaching me?" Benny shrugged, as Dora came even closer.

"I can't beat the shit out of you without coming closer." She said.

"Oh ho! Then come as close as you like!" Benny haughitly laughed.

Dora didn't want a nice quick kill but a bloody, slow one, involving a lot of bloodshed and agony (from Benny's part)

Benny pulled out a katana from a stand in somepart of the room. Dora in part pulled out a huge knofe. Their weapons clashed, and sent sparks flying. 

She fired some shots, which Benny agily dodged. He then brought down the katana upon Dora's head, and she blocked the blow. She jumped back, and attempted to throw the knife at Benny's head. He ducked, and the knife buried itself into the nearby pillar.

Dora grimaced, running to try to retrieve the knife. Benny saw that coming and slashed at her. Dora managed to back away just in time and fired more bullets at benny, who skillfully jumped away.

She pulled the knife from its sheath and fired some sneak shots at Benny. It struck him on the legs and slowed down his movement. 

Dora then took advantage of Benny's injury and knocked the katana from his hand, clipping his hoof in the process. The katana skittered across the floor, and Benny slid across it to retrieve his weapon. He did that successfully, and slashed at Dora. 

She got cut on her cheek, and she flinched painfully. Both parties were getting exhausted, and Benny spoke up.

" Hey, Dora, we should end this. Boss is gonna get mad if this keeps up. Look, I'll even give you back your free cupcake membership card." 

Dora was thrilled except for one part. What boss? Wasn't Benny the leader of the yamooza already? Who else did he have to report to? 

"Okie. My membership first." Dora held out her hand for the paper. Benny snapped his hoofs (how?) And an assistant scurried over with a badly taped up piece of paper. He signed it before passing it into Dora's outstretched hand.

She took it and stuffed it into her bag without a second look.

Benny looked very smug there. He chuckled. "Hahahaha...I've tricked you, Dora! That wasn't the cupcake membership but the fitness membership!!! I couldn't let you have the membership back you see, because I want it all for myself!!!" Dora recoiled with shock. 

Anger bubbled in her, and before she knew it, the knife blossomed in Benny's chest. He screamed in agony before toppling to the ground.

"D-dang…I thought I would have gotten away with this too… " those were Benny's final words.

Dora pulled out the knife and placed it inside her bag. She then reached down and pulled the real membership notice from Benny's pocket. 

"The cupcakes are all mine!!!! Yaaaaaaayyy!!!" Dora exclaimed, doing the fortnite default dance over Benny's corpse. She also realised another thing. Now that Benny is gone, who is the leader of the yamooza now? But Benny did say that he had a boss, maybe he'll come by soon.

But she had other things to worry about.

The ending song.

Dora took a deep breath and started the earrape once again.

We did it!  
We did it!  
We did it!  
Yay!  
Lo hicimos(we did it)  
We did it!

First we went to Tico's house and then blew it up. Yeah we did it!  
We did it!   
We did it!  
Hurray!

And then we built a plane out of estacy. Yeah we did it!  
We did it!  
We did it!  
Hurray!

Afterwards we went to kill Benny yeah we did it! And then we got my membership back! 

Yay!  
Whooo!  
Hooray!!!  
We did it!!!!!!

So Dora went to the cupcake store nearby, flexed her membership and started eating.

It was not long after when she received a call.

"Hey, Dora. It's Diego."

Dora the drug dealer part 1   
End

**Author's Note:**

> I might make a part two if i feel up to it or if people enjoy it which makes me feel up to it.
> 
> Who the shit would even read this kinda trash anyways lol


End file.
